Another interview

I had an interview today for an ELL tutor position at an elementary school. I know, I know, it's still just a classified position and not a certified position but I gotta do what I gotta do in order to get my foot in the door (again) for a position that I actually am interested in (only it must be certified). Although, every time I put my foot in the door somebody slams the door. Maybe this will be more promising though. I know Kyle's kinda frustrated that this job is only paying $10.24/hour but I got get what I can get. I feel a little frustrated because I feel like I'm having to recreate myself to fit into this city and its school districts. It's like a career identity crisis for me. Sometimes I feel like throwing in the towel but I know I can't and that would be a total waste of my talents and knowledge.

I'm also having a feeling of helplessness with my personal goals such as weight loss/management. Ugh. I know I complain about this a lot but hey, sometimes I just need to write it all out and sift through my thoughts. I usually feel a lot better afterwards (most of the time). I lost motivation for working out. I think the problem was that in the past, I was working out at such a high intensity that it wasn't sustainable over a long period of time. I'm starting to regain my workout motivation but now it's the food issue. I start out in the beginning of the week doing really well and watching what and how much I eat but lately, I don't know if it's job stress/career identity crisis, but I find myself slipping down that slope of comfort eating and I immediately go for the "bad" foods. All the stuff that I don't need to be eating and that includes either extra helpings or desserts. I don't know what to do but I do know that I can't gain weight because I've thrown out all of my "big" clothes. So, I either have to maintain the weight that I am or if I want to lose those last 10 pounds, I need to find a new way to get motivated. I think I'm gonna be okay because I'm starting to feel renewed now that school's out but I still need to learn how to deal with these feelings no matter what. Why does weight loss have to be so stressful? Isn't that the one thing that triggers the gain--stress? Or at least it does for me...It seems as if, even if I have only one indiscretion with food, the scale jumps up 5 pounds--where's the justice in that? :(